In the first letter to Dear Abby, a reader named “Deep in the Drama in California” opens up about their struggle with a terminally ill spouse who is engaging in infidelity. The reader explains that their wife admitted to having a long-term romantic affair with a married man and that they were both waiting for their respective partners to leave them so they could be together. However, shortly after this confession, the wife became critically ill and now requires 24-hour care. The reader is torn between wanting to confront the affair and feeling trapped because they fear leaving their spouse would leave them with no one to care for them. They seek advice on how to navigate this difficult dilemma.
Dear Abby responds by assuring the reader that they are not trapped unless they choose to be. She emphasizes that trust is crucial in a marriage, and if the wife truly felt remorseful about the affair, she would be open and honest about it. Abby suggests that the reader consult with an attorney to understand their responsibilities if they were to consider divorce after five years of marriage. She believes that the reader should not be forced to be their spouse’s caregiver under these circumstances.
In the second letter, a concerned grandparent from South Carolina writes to Dear Abby about their 11-year-old grandson, Lucas. The writer explains that Lucas’ mother allowed them to have him anytime they wanted, and he even lived with them while his mother was in rehab. However, Lucas is now living with his mother again, who has two other children and lives with their father. The writer is worried because their daughter plans to move 40 minutes away and transfer Lucas to a new school. They believe that Lucas will struggle with this change as they have been his main source of social interaction and he has been involved in Boy Scouts with the same group of boys for five years.
Dear Abby advises the concerned grandparent to try to convince their daughter to allow Lucas to stay with them so he can continue to have a social life and remain with his peer group. However, if the mother is not open to this idea, Abby suggests that the grandparent may have no choice but to let Lucas go. She acknowledges that starting a new school in sixth or seventh grade can be challenging due to established cliques. Abby commends the grandparent for their care and concern and wishes them luck in their efforts to make the best decision for Lucas.
In both responses, Abby provides straightforward and practical advice to the readers. She emphasizes the importance of trust and personal well-being in relationships, encouraging the readers to consider their own needs and consult professionals if necessary. Abby’s empathetic tone and understanding of the readers’ situations make her advice relatable and helpful. As always, Dear Abby offers a space for readers to seek guidance on their personal struggles and dilemmas, providing them with a comforting voice and practical solutions.
